|Indonesia FAQ #2|
Date: Tue, 17 Oct 1995 12:42:33 UTC A BRIEF LINGUSITIC PRIMER FOR SEXUAL NEGOTIATIONS If by chance half way through the massage you think she's saying "suck it", "suck it", check again. She is probably saying, "sakit", "sakit" ... "ouch, that hurts". These are petite women, very delicate ... deliciously so!! On that note, another piece of linguistic advice: if her English is limited and before you enter the cubicle she says "do it", "do it" .... steady on, contain that hot headed ardor, what she is saying is "duit". "duit" .... "money first, please!!" RED-LIGHT DISTRICTS Jakarta has its official unofficial red-light districts. Two of these are Kramat and Pejompongan Indah. Every now and again the police bust them, but they continue on. Very cheap but not recommended for the tourist: the girls may or not be okay, certainly the premises will be sleazy, grimy and a hang out for the local mafioso types. Even worse, they serve warm beer!! If cheap and local, however, is your cultural preference, then read on and try the "panti pijat" - lower end. BE STREET WISE Plenty of street girls operate. Often these are "banci's" or "bencong's" ... gender benders with straight bananas!! Girls operating the streets around the major hotels are probably safe in terms of skullduggery and criminality etc. Safe in terms of AIDS, who knows. But you know what you should be doing. Suffice to say AIDS exists in Indonesia and, although intravenous drug use isn't big as yet, the disease is being passed around - primarily through sex. Beware. Indonesian women as yet rarely insist on a condom. You should educate them on this. PANTI PIJATS-BARS-DISCOS-KARAOKE Indonesia has the ubiquitous "panti pijat" ... the massage parlor. They range from a couple of grotty rooms at the back of a house through to swish, well-appointed parlors in major shopping centers and hotels, where they will probably be called anything but "panti pijat". In Jakarta, and most every where else, the panti pijat will show you the numbered, soft-focus portraits of beautiful Indonesian women ready to massage away the grit and grime of the smoky city. Just as books should not be judged by their covers, the same is true of massage girls and their photos. Other establishments offering massage services, and where the emphasis is more obviously on the latter, you will find the traditional Asian fishbowl. Numbered girls sitting bug eyed and blowing vacuously behind one way glass. You choose the number and quantity you want. At the bottom end of the panti-pijat scale you are likely to get a low-lying bed in a narrow room made of plywood walls that never reach the ceiling. The entrance to the room is a light piece of cloth. Don't grunt to loud, you might blow the door away. If your turn on is the risk of getting caught in the act is, this is your Nirvana. A hot shower afterwards involves an ignominious walk to a room down the hall. Depending on how low scale you go, it may involve a walk to open air cubicle with a bucket of cold water. Once you pay the $3 or $4 massage fee and are given your towel and taken behind the curtain, you strip to your jockeys, or all the way if you wish. Within a few minutes the "young, glowing woman" of your photo arrives. She's in fact an "ibu" (mother or old woman) well into her 40's, dressed in traditional batik sarong and "kebaya" top. She will give you a truly superb massage. Those hands will seek out knots at a subterranean level in your muscles. Those same hands will find nerves and muscles in your buttocks (just the buttocks) that you never knew you had. Exquisite torture! Those same hands will knead closer and closer to the edge of your jockeys .... just testing the water for future reference. The ibu will tweak every knuckle in every joint of every finger and every toe. Then she'll jump on your back and pole-vault down your spine. Crack attack !! If you were surprised at the sensitivity of your buttocks, wait till she buries her thumbs two joints deep into the soles of your feet. Eeeeiyow that was .... nice !! Now it's time to turn over. Yes, time to go belly-up. By now your body is tingling and numb. You feel like a play-dough doll with an itch. And she will get to that itch by accidentally flicking the edge of your jockey shorts. Or if you are without those and just have the towel draped across you, the towel will almost certainly be accidentally knocked aside and your "itch" be accidentally scratched. The moment of truth has arrived. Without a word of English she will offer you a hand job or the hidden mysteries screened behind her batik sarong. What she won't do -- quite possibly -- is offer you a head job. You will point to her mouth and she'll probably say "saya sudah makan" ... I've already eaten, thanks. Remember, this 40 -ish old ibu is a muslim who never heard of the sexual revolution and never read Cleo in her life. Price? Bargain? You can negotiate before hand. Some men do, some don't. At this level of panti-pijat, either way it's going to be cheap. No more than $15. Look on it as a cultural rather than sexual experience. The massage is worth it. MEDIUM-CLAS PANTI PIJATS Where do you find these places? The ones in the phone book are the up market whore houses. The hotel's panti-pijat may well be a legitimate massage place. The bottom end panti-pijats don't even have the phone connected. Just tell your taxi driver "panti-pijat". He'll know. Next level up is the bar-amusement-center- karaoke-massage-parlour, or some similar combination thereof. At this level there is much greater variety in the way the panti-pijat is run and the how its services are presented. Look, however, for one that clearly has "panti-pijat" or "massage-parlor" in their neon sign. Other bars have free-lance girls but not the cubicles. Here the girls are younger and not necessarily confined to a room behind one-way glass photos or to photos on a wall. Here she may well sit you with you and she will speak some English. Buy her a drink. Very few scams go on, you're not likely to get ripped off. Give her a couple of thousand rupiah ($1 - $2 only). Tell her it's for her cigarettes or taxi home ("uang rokok" - cigarette money - or "uang taxi", national euphemisms for any kind of small gratuity). If she's not to your taste, you can say you'd like to talk to someone else. Pay for your massage fee and/or room hire fee and away you go. The cubicle is bigger here and the hot water's attached. But that scungy curtain is still likely to be there. Unlike Thailand, there is no bar fee (unless its included in the cost of the massage/room). But this may be because you don't need to take the girl away. If you want to do that, better you make a date for later, after her shift. You can find these places in the night-life areas of the major cities. In Jakarta they are mostly around Chinatown, known as Kota or Glodok, down at Jalan Mangga Besar. Prices, a guestimate: room $5, massage $5, sex $20 to $30 for about an hour. Next up the panti pijat scale are the dedicated health spa and massage parlors. These are much more upmarket and not a lot needs to be said. They are cleaner, the women are in their prime, the cubicles are rooms and the curtains are doors. Try the Copa Cobana at Ancol, visit Blora in Jakarta's business district or try the many Japanese places in Blok M. There are many mentioned in the yellow pages. Beware, some may be legitimate massage and health centers. Prices here FREE SEX Of course, free sex, the best kind. It's available. But, as you know, freedom is a pricey commodity! Where? Jakarta has hundreds of bars all over the city. These range from live music discos of 5 star quality to smoky dives with a tape deck that's too loud and too old belting you around the head. Obviously, the more upmarket the locale, the more upmarket the women. By that is meant the women on the game are going to be pretty cute and pretty pricey and there won't be so many of them. But there will be plenty of modern get ahead girls from the secretarial and management classes out on the town for a bit of fun. Whether this fun includes sex may well depend on your powers of persuasion. The scene here is probably just as it is anywhere. Some girls do, some girls don't. It is possible, however, that for a number of reasons, the white foreigner ("bule") has a slight advantage over his male Indonesian counterpart. A liaison with a bule is less likely to a way of getting back to the ears of colleagues, friends and family. There's a greater likelihood the bule is richer. The bule is more exotic (but that notion is rapidly and rightfully disappearing ... there are a lot of foreigners with their arseholes on display here). The bule husband has certain attractions for the young, educated woman who sees a future of fairly limited opportunities despite her middle-class station. Then there is free sex with the "cewek" set. These are the girls who can be best described as part-time prostitutes, though they'd be insulted at the suggestion. Often they are separated from their husbands and have a child. But not always. Quite a few have never married. A lot of them have day jobs of an unskilled nature. But there are also quite a few young women who are professionally employed. Perhaps the common thread is that, for whatever reason, they have been able to or have been forced to cast of the shackles of an intensively protective patriarchal system (and replaced it with a western one?). They're at just about all of the mid-range bars. That is, the dedicated pubs and small live music bars, not necessarily the bars attached to major hotels. You never really know if she is on the game or just out for a bit of fun. Locals perceive them as being strictly after a rich foreigner for marriage. This may or may not be true. Whatever the case, if you show your willing, she will stick with you for as long as you wish. But this is where the issue of prostitution becomes blurred. She will expect you to buy her some nice clothes, eat at good restaurants, visit the cinemas, take her to Bali etc, etc. And she will borrow some small amounts of money. Is this prostitution? Probably, but they would deny it. After all, she will say, she doesn't sleep with just anyone. And that is probably very true. Ironically, she often hangs out at the same places where the masseuses work their cubicles or where the pros sit down at your table. That's why it's such a blurred distinction. Anyway, have fun and spend a bit of money on her. God knows she needs it, especially if she has a kid to send to school. A one night stand back at your hotel room with these women is often the best. And, really, it's a lot easier just to assume to yourself she is on the game and offer her Rp. 60,000 taxi money the next morning (that's about $28 dollars for a nights fun). If she is offended, an apology along with a quick trip to the local dress shop should suffice. Some places where you may get lucky and pay nothing: visit Jalan Palatehan I in Blok M. There are several bars here devoted to the local expatriate crowd. Lots of whores, lots of freebies, depends on a range of imponderable factors (easier to pay in my opinion). Blok M has a range of bars and the girls vary from place to place. Try Oscars, the Club, Sportsmans, Top Gun. Further away is Hotmans Bar at the Hotel Sofyan, which may or may not still be popular. In the CBD is the Jaya Pub and, next door, 2 or 3 slightly upmarket places with good live music. Green Pub across the road is perhaps worth a visit.
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